Sunday, August 31, 2008

"Baby Bashers"

There seems to be an epidemic in our society of people inflicted with a virus of hatred toward children. My husband and I stand in position of direct opposition: we love children. When we were pregnant, we heard so much negativity about carrying a child and what to expect when you are laboring. When we were laboring, I had to mentally block all those things from my memory so that I could focus on a positive birthing experience, which I (incorrectly) assumed was the pinnacle of my woes. Not so.

My daughter is now ten weeks old and I am just starting the climb up a perilous mountain of discouraging comments. I understand in any circumstance there will be individuals with commentary that doesn't sit right with you. Perhaps the most surprising element for me is the source of this negativism: my pastors.

Recently, my husband gave testimony at our church about our miraculous home birthing experience and the healthful birth of our 10 lb. baby. Just after that, our pastor rose to the pulpit to speak... and he did: about poop and puke and about our amazing "bowling ball".

The following week we were attending a new service and we came in contact with our children's pastor who firmly reminded us three times that if our child becomes louder than the activity on the stage we had to take her to the nursery and be in their care (I'm sure removing myself from the sanctuary would have sufficed, but it wasn't mentioned as an option). At the very least, I was offended that my church would stifle the sounds of "infants and babes" but also that they would suggest separating a nursing child from her mother. It just seems rude.

1 comment:

Nicole said...

I TOTALLY am with you on this one. I think it is ridiculous. Fortunately the synagogue we go to LOVES babies and if a toddler grows loud (over the pastor/rabbi) he'll often say "Amen, brother!" or "C'mon what i'm saying isn't THAT bad".. . .it's pretty funny and makes us all young mommies comfortable. . we've church hopped before, though, and there was one church that we visited that reminded me like 4 times about their "excellent nursery". . . There was only ONE OTHER mom with children in the service. . .how sad. How are our children to learn to behave if we do not offer them the situations to behave in? It's easy to stick a child in a boxed room, it's not so easy to take our parenting seriously and bring them wherever we go. Kudos, Cai for loving your child intensely and taking your parenting seriously.